I’m not sure how I heard about No Pants Metro Ride 2012. It could have come to me in a dream for all I know. But there it was. For the fourth time apparently. A day when people ride the metro here in LA and other major cities without pants. In other words, how a typical Sunday for me just in public.
I was primed for this event from my earlier Hot Cookie photo sesh. It was suggested by dear old sis that I wear that fabled underwear on the metro today. I would have considered it if the underwear in question actually fit me. But they were honestly so tight I think I might’ve lost circulation in my thighs and maybe worse in the two or three hours the event was going to last. Not to mention they were so small there was serious danger of some ball slippage. I went with black boxer briefs instead.
The ride was scheduled to begin at 1pm at various metro locations all over LA culminating at a group photo in Union Station. I found out beforehand that Chrystine was also attending with some of her friends. While in some ways this would make it less scary now that I knew somebody there, it might also be more scary now that I knew somebody there. I’m friends with Chrystine and all, but we hadn’t reached the see each other in our underwear phase quite yet.
While we were waiting outside, some people took off their pants straight away. I hesitated. I decided to wait for Chrystine but eventually I just said fuck it and took my pants off. I felt fine with my pants off. It wasn’t so bad since most people around me had theirs off as well.
Chrystine and her friends eventually showed up and we were off.
Getting on the metro was slightly weird at first but again, there were so many of us it wasn’t that scary. Chrystine and her friends moved to one end of the car. I stayed where I was with some strangers to try and scary this thing up some more. After a few stops, the strangers decided to go to a different car. I stayed behind and was by myself for a bit but at the next stop another pantless rider came on.
I wanted to try and find a car where I was the only person without pants. I start jumping between the cars at stops but the whole train pretty much had underwear clad individuals.
We were given instructions not to talk to each other or explain to anyone what we were doing, even if they asked. I was with a couple of pantless riders when a woman asked us what was going on. If we were doing some sort of Occupy protest. We all kind of shrugged and played dumb. The woman started out looking so interested and happy but when we continually gave her the run-around, she looked annoyed and disappointed. I thought that rule was stupid. So I leaned forward and told her quietly it was just for fun, not a statement or anything.
She smiled and seemed to appreciate that I was finally coming clean. From then on, if somebody asked me, I eventually told them it was just a fun thing. Then I asked if they wanted to join in. Cause otherwise I felt like a cliquish prick.
When we got to Union Station, I met up with Chrystine and we hung out for a bit. We were supposed to catch the next train back to Hollywood and Highland to finish up the ride. In the meantime, we had a group photo session. There were even local news stations there.
Walking with Chrystine through Union Station I did notice the creep factor for the women. There were lots of pervy guys checking them out. Now, I admit, there were some hotties in their underwear out there. But there were also a lot of underage girls. I felt protective of my fellow underwear-wearers. For the most part, people were cool with the whole thing.
On the way back, me and Chrystine missed the train so we had to take a later one. That was scarier since we were the only people in our underwear on the next train. Even scarier was sitting in my underwear on the metro. My ass is surely a veritable petri dish of cooties now.
But by the time we got to Hollywood and Highland, the group had dispersed. Chrystine went off to hang out with her friends and I headed home, after putting my pants off first.
Overall, it was scary but the things I had done before helped it be much less scary than it could’ve been. The hardest part is getting started. Like taking off my pants the first time or even standing up after me and Chrystine had been sitting on the metro for so long, exposing our pantlessness. But once you do, it’s ok. It’s harder and harder to give a fuck the more you do weird shit in public because you realize nothing bad really happens. Even if you are embarrassed, it’s fleeting.
Oh and the only pic I have right now of myself is the one I took of my reflection on the metro. But there are some floating around there and I’ll post as soon as I find one…
Edit: Got some pics of me! And in case you’re wondering why I have that girl’s booty shot up, I’m out of focus in the background. That’s the only reason.